Ten short years ago, I was an Elf at the mall.
Not because I thought it would be fun.
Not because I love hanging out with crabby, crying toddlers, kids and babies…
Because the predicament I found myself in, $15 an hour was great money!!!
Wilson’s (the leather store) offered me $8.80/hr which included an additional .30 per hour because of my 20 yrs of corporate sales experience. Hilarious! It didn’t even cover my gas to get to the mall.
I did work with some fun Santa’s along the way.
Santa Garth on the left, Santa Larry on the right.
My desire to help young girls and women with their eating disorders had created some powerful results. But my business was failing.
I couldn’t figure out what I was doing wrong, or what I was missing, or why it appeared I was falling through the cracks.
I knew I was here to help other people, yet it was like a wave on the ocean, up with a giant swell (optimism), then down to low-tide (bummer).
I spoke for the American Dental Society in Chicago, September of ’13 and was so warmly received.
They put me up in the Ritz Carlton…I didn’t have $20 to my name.
Then I spoke on 8 college campuses in October, yet there was no forward momentum for anything.
Every day I was treading water to keep from drowning.
I was literally living on oatmeal and popcorn.
So this was what survival mode is. Never thought I would be in this place.
This was embarrassing.
I had already lost my home in California 2 years before attempting to make this work, and I continued on a downward spiral…encouraged by little blips of a new speech or coaching client.
My best Pollyanna positive attitude wasn’t doing shit to help me.
My deep-seated limiting beliefs about money, my value and qualifications were pulling me under, sucking the life out of me.
Was I scared? Hell yes! I didn’t know where to turn…or what to do.
Nothing was working.
And I had promised myself that I wouldn’t go back to get a J-O-B.
If I was committed to making a difference in the lives of others, apparently there was a different approach or path. This surely wasn’t working.
Why couldn’t I make it? Why was I failing?
I knew I was here to coach and speak and write.
I was so enveloped in fog, that I couldn’t even see the fork in the road ahead.
Being an Elf was an experience in patience, humility and creativity – learning to play with the kids and Santa.
Yet harder than that, was at the time wondering if I would ever be a part of society again, if I would ever reconnect with the lifestyle I was used to living.
I was so totally focused on “what was wrong, what was lacking and what wasn’t working.”
You could say I was stuck…understatement.
Giving up is not in my DNA.
Persistence and Determination run through my veins…yet there was something different calling me.
I waved the white flag and looked for a J-O-B. Even that didn’t happen for another year.
It’s all about timing. And being open to what the Universe has in store for you.
What I learned was that this time wasn’t about pushing or determination or sheer will.
It was time for me to learn to shift my beliefs about money and about my ability to be a successful business owner. This included allowing myself to be “good enough” to own my value and learn how to use this special gift I was given to help other people improve their quality of life.
Sometimes you’ve just got to face the FEAR to move beyond it.
You can’t hide from it forever and get where you want to go.
I did a lot of work on myself, my beliefs about money, and had to let go of comparing myself to other speakers and coaches.
Today, my life is much different.
My focus shifted back to women and men in Corporate as I knew it one day would. I’m helping executives, businesses and individuals learn to collaborate, communicate to improve their culture and their lives.
What I learned along this journey is that pushing through is rarely the answer.
Commitment vs. giving up is still important, yet taking inspired action vs just being busy all the time is much more effective.
The results are incredibly powerful.
This past week I was invited to Monterey, California to attend a celebration for my coach Patty, as Woman of the Year.
Instead of hanging with Santa and the kids, I was surrounded by many very successful, warm, wealthy, generous female business owners.
I’ve learned to live in FLOW vs. fear.
My new dogs showed up this year when I was ready.
New clients come by referral, as I’ve always wanted them to.
I’m speaking for larger audiences, reaching, connecting and inspiring more people than ever before.
Most importantly? I’m satisfied with where my life is, and excited to see where it leads me next.
Never, ever give up
Slow down, quiet your mind and listen for the inspiration, the nudge, the idea to take action.
And before you know it, 10 years have gone by and your life is better than ever, filled with more joy, happiness, satisfaction and love than you’ve ever known. And you’re living the dream you’ve been holding on to.
I’m in the Reality business…helping clients, just like you to create the reality you want to live.
Together we make the impossible, POSSIBLE.
And now you know why I always say….