I’ve been thinking about the difference between effort and resistance lately.
Not because I was on a river, but because I realized how often you create your own upstream battles— using force to pursue something that isn’t aligned with who you are. Sometimes the misalignment is a small detour, other times, it’s not your path, yet you keep pushing:
- Because you set a goal
- Because you made a promise
- Because you feel you owe it to someone or something
These images capture this vastly different experience. In the first photo, the woman is working incredibly hard trying to force her way upstream (like a salmon). The other is moving with the current, taking in the scenery while remaining ready to paddle whenever she needs to steer or change course. Notice her level of effort, is far less. Instead of attempting to force the river to cooperate and take her upstream, she is working with it…in flow.
Flow isn’t the absence of effort;
it is the absence of unnecessary resistance.
The question isn’t about which person is working harder, or putting in more effort.
The question is: Which one is moving in the direction the river is already flowing?
Finding My Flow
It reminds me of something I experienced just a few weeks ago.
At the WELD National Leadership Conference, I walked on stage feeling different than I ever have before.
- Not more prepared, I am always prepared.
- Not more polished, I’ve been speaking professionally for many years.
- I was simply…fully present.
There was no internal pressure to prove myself. No mental chatter about whether the audience would like me or my message. And no need to earn approval or validation.
My goal wasn’t to create a great experience. I was there to serve—with a much deeper understanding of what that actually means. And immediately I felt it—and they did too.
- My stories flowed naturally.
- The laughter came easily, when I didn’t expect it.
- The interactions felt effortless.
Attendees stayed afterward to talk, share their stories, seek advice and continue the conversation. Several followed up afterward, and we’ve met one-on-one.
New Context
That experience gave new meaning to something I’ve been sharing for years. With new context.
- There’s a difference between inspired action and resistance.
- Leadership still requires effort.
- Building a career or business still requires effort.
- Creating meaningful relationships still requires effort.
- But effort doesn’t have to feel like you’re fighting the current.
Sometimes the greatest shift happens when you stop trying to force an outcome and become fully present with the moment we’re in. That’s when you begin to notice the guidance—the gut feeling, or “nudge,” as I like to call it. It’s always there. It’s just often drowned out by the noise.
When you’re aligned with who you are, what you value, and how you’re meant to show up, your energy changes. And people feel it. You begin to notice opportunities that were there all along. Conversations are more genuine. And what once felt like an uphill battle begins to feel like moving with the current instead of against it.
You’ve heard me say, “Your energy precedes you…” before you walk into the room for a big meeting, conversation or presentation. Whatever you’re focused on or expecting, is likely to be waiting there to greet you.
So here’s my question for you: Where are you creating resistance that no longer serves you?
Your answer could change everything.
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